The temperature will be in the negative degrees today as yet another cold front
moves in.  Expect blizzard like conditions in the later part of the day into evening.  Estimated
snow fall, one to two feet.”  The weather report didn’t look good.  What am I going to do, It has
been hell already, wee, actually quite the opposite.  It has been cold, and now…even colder.  How
could I have gotten into this situation, I really don’t remember.  It was not that long ago.  What
only, four years.  I’ve dealt with it, sucks, but I dealt with it.  But sometimes, I still cannot
believe that my family kicked me out.  For a stupid reason too.  Just cus I’m gay, I mean what’s
the big deal with that.  Realistically, what kinda parents kick out their own child at 17.  My dad
could have gone to jail, but I didn’t care then, I was too distraught.  Current day, I was
wondering the streets of New York, my shoes are nearly gone, and I wear nothing but tossed rags. 
Maybe that is an exaggeration.  But still a traumatic situation.  You may have no idea what it is
like on the streets.  The spaces for shelters fill up quick.  It is like the law of nature.  The
strong survive, the weak perish.  Only I just won’t perish.  What does that say, I am strong?  Hell
no, I am weak.  Small and weak.  I wouldn’t give to have a family that loves me, someone that loves
me personally, romantically.  Hell, food would be nice.  But I eat. --  How do I get my food?  What
a mystery for a gay guy.  I know, I feel so bad, used, but what could I do.  I survive.  I need to
survive.  Tonight was no different than any other.  Other than the fact that it was Christmas Eve. 
A season, that passes with only a brisk throught from me.  I mean, what do I deserve.  Much more
than I get, but what could I do about it.  So I hung around the hood.  At least that’s what I
called it.  It was actually a nice section of town.  There were a few apartments down the street
and businesses down the other side.  All in all a comfortable spot to be, other than the fact that
there were about five of us hanging around the corners.  I knew the bunch.  Brandon, Kyle, Jacob,
and Austin.  Then there was me, not the youngest, but certainly the one who looks it.  Maybe that
is why I eat the best of all of us, I’ve also seen the most business.  This comes with a price.  I
haven’t been to a doctor in years, but I know the verdict.  I have something.  Have to.  Sure
enough the regulars stared down the street.  I knew that this night I would get business.  I
stepped out onto the street and held my hand out.  Our signal.  Only the car didn’t stop it kept
going.  In the nick of time I dived out of the way, only to realize that I lost my shoes in the
process. I looked at the remnants of them as they were run over by the car.

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  There was nothing
left.  I had no shoes.  My concentration shifted and I noticed my feet, numb.  I called it a
night.  Without shoes, I needed to find a place to stay that was at least a little dry.  So I
started down the street. “Where you goin’,”  I heard Brandon say.  “You need to eat, don’t you?”
“No, I ain’t doin’ this on Christmas Eve.” “Have it your way.”  He started to hold out his hand,
our signal. So, towards the apartments I went.  It was unintentional, but I started to look into
the window.  There I saw the most depressing thing that I have ever seen.  Happiness.  I saw, a fat
turkey, gravy, potatoes, and a family.  A father, mother, brother, and sister.  It was cool to see
people so happy.  Then I looked down and saw my own shoeless feet.  I wasn’t in that house, with
the turkey, and other food. I continued down the street.  A car pulled up to the curb.  “Hey, boy,
you available,” a man said as he motioned toward his crotch area.  Suddenly a bright light shone in
the back seet.  There someone sat in clean clothes.  White and she looked at me slowly shook her
head.  “Well?”  The man persisted. “No.”  He drove off in a flurry.  The lady was gone.  I
continued down the street and saw in another window something that took my breath away.  Two guys,
cute guys were having dinner together.  To the untrained eye, you wouldn’t suspect.  But I saw, on
the table, behind the food one of them had his hand over the other. I sighed. “Hey, you there!!”  I
heard from behind me. I looked up at the heavens where inches of snow fell.  ‘Please, why me.’ 
“No!!!  I am not available.” “FAG!”  And I heard him drive off.  I turned to look and saw that same
white flash dull in the back seat of a speeding car.  ‘What the hell.  What the hell.  Bright
people in backseats of pervert’s cars.  Shaking their head no at me.  What the hell.  What are
they, angels?’  I turned into an ally intending to find a place to sleep, albeit, it isn’t the most
comfortable place, it was shelter from the wind.  I closed my eyes.  There I saw it.  Before my
eyelids.  It was the ‘angel.’  I opened them again, yet, he, a he now, was still there. “Who are
you?” I asked. “Your angel.” “Mine?” “Yes, I am your guardian angel.” I looked around, “How come I
haven’t seen you before in my life.” “Because, you weren’t meant to.” “So, why do I see you now.”
“Because you are meant to.  Let me take you to a place that is nice and safe.”  And the angel
scooped me up and flew off with me calmly  resting in his arms with my head against his chest. --
The next morning, Christmas morning, Kyle found nothing but a tattered and torn pair of shoes and
in the ally not far away, the impression of someone, still fresh in the snow.

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