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I owe my life to Guru Tsu. I discovered his teachings when
I was twelve. Before my parents' divorce, I practically lived in
the library. When I read the first book, it was as if I could
see for the first time. His words gave me comfort when I needed
it the most.
It wasn't long before I sought out other followers of Guru
Tsu's Way. We'd meet once or twice a week to meditate, study his
writings and do enlightenment exercises. I was really good at
"going to level," what we called the deep meditation state.
Glory, who had actually studied under Guru Tsu, said I was really
advanced for my age. She said that I had an "inner illumination"
that would make me a natural guide, but that I needed further,
deeper instruction. My heart leapt when she told me that I might
be able to learn at the feet of Guru Tsu himself. But I'd have
to wait until I was older and, until then, I'd have to follow the
Way, especially the paths of purity and chastity. As if she had
to tell me!
From that moment on I counted the days. It was hard doing
mundane things like going to school and doing chores, but I
ignored the hedonism of the other kids at school by meditating
and studying the Way. My mom, unable to control her own worldly
urges, wasn't around much anyway, so I had plenty of time to
contemplate on the Way.
The days became months, then years. Many people came and
left our cluster as their faith in the Way waxed and waned, but I
never wavered in my resolve. I devoutly followed the Way, and
finally my devotion was rewarded. I was called to join Guru Tsu
at the Common!
When I boarded the private plane, it took every bit of my
meditative control to keep my excitement in check. Through the
long flight, I tried to stay at level, but my mind was awash in
anticipation. Glory had cautioned me that even with all my years
of study and exercise, it could never compare with the experience
of studying under Guru Tsu himself. My being would be in a
constant state of wonderment, if not utter shock.
I got my first surprise as I got off the plane and saw that
no one at the Common wore clothes. It really shouldn't have
surprised me. After all, matters of the spirit was the
preoccupation here, not physicality. Still, it took a bit of
adjustment. I'd immersed myself in virtue and purity practically
my entire life, rejecting all thoughts of the flesh. It was hard
to see people, both women and, especially, men, displaying
themselves shamelessly without being reminded of my own carnal
feelings. It was to be my first lesson.
I was greeted by a young woman who told me her name was
Pearl and she was to be my guide for the first few days until I
became accustomed to my new surroundings. She showed me to my
room and said I could leave my clothes there and she would show
me the grounds. When I stood naked before her, I tried not to be
self-conscious, but she noticed it right away. "Don't worry,"
she laughed. "Once you meet with Tsu, you'll get over it."
As we wandered the grounds while she pointed out the
meditation temple, the dining halls and the other areas, I
couldn't help but notice that every man who crossed our path
seemed to be in a state of sexual arousal. I'd never seen a man
naked before, but I'd studied enough to know that guys weren't
always erect like that. Then I noticed that every woman there,
including Pearl, were obviously sexually excited as well, even
the ones that were in various stages of pregnancy. Their thighs
were literally dripping with moistness. I suddenly recognized
that for the first time in my life I was filled with what I could
only call a sensual lust. My nipples, like every other woman in
the Common, were thick and tight and I felt a growing warmth
between my legs.
As if she could hear my innermost thoughts, Pearl smiled and
said, "Yes, one's first days at the Common can be confusing in
its joy, but Tsu will explain everything."
We ate dinner in one of the small halls. We sat with two
other girls. Pearl introduced me to Undine. She was also a
guide. The girl with her had come to the Common the previous
day. Pearl told them I'd meet with Guru Tsu tomorrow. Undine
told us the girl she was with would be seeing him tomorrow, too.
It was odd, but I didn't catch the name of Undine's charge.
"I'm so jealous of the two of you," Undine said.
"I wish I
could re-live meeting Tsu for the first time. How wonderful the
experience is!"
The other new girl didn't say much during dinner. She
probably felt like me, a little shy and a bit overwhelmed by all
the newness. I could tell, though, that she was filled with
excitement. When we all finished eating and rose to leave, I
couldn't help but notice that her thighs were coated with a filmy
fluid. Just like Undine's and Pearl's. Just like mine.
It turned out that Undine's ward had the room next to mine,
so the four of us walked back to the living quarters together.
When we got to my room, Undine said the two of them would see us
at lunch the next day, and then we'd go together to the yang
reception ceremony. Then they both went into the new girl's
room.
Pearl opened my door and we went in. I was exhausted from
all the excitement of the day and I sat on the bed, ready to
collapse. Pearl sat next to me and hugged me tightly. The
feeling of her breasts pressed upon mine only made the unusual
desire within me burn deeper. When she kissed me, our tongues
met and I moaned slightly, a shiver traveling up my legs and into
my belly. Then she got up and went to the door, saying, "Sleep
well. You've got a demanding day tomorrow."
I slipped into bed, shaking a bit from the confusing
feelings I was experiencing. The sheets, surprisingly, felt like
satin and, unaccustomed to sleeping in the nude, the material
against my flesh only increased the intensity of the embers I
felt inside me trying to burst into an inferno. For the first
time in years I was tempted to touch myself, but I called upon my
meditation training, went to level and soon I was asleep.
The next morning, I was woken by a kiss. Pearl had brought
me breakfast. As I ate, Pearl outlined my day. First was a
series of physical exercises to prepare my body for the spiritual
teachings that followed. Then, after I was physically cleansed
and ready, I would be brought to Guru Tsu for a series of
personal instruction and training. I grew excited in
anticipation. Then I would participate in the yang reception
ceremony. Before I could even ask, Pearl said, "I can't explain
or even describe it. After your audience with Tsu, you will
understand."
To be honest, I wasn't looking forward to the physical
exercises. I'm really not much into exercising. No one would
ever accuse me of being skinny, but I'm not grossly overweight
and I'd had my share of boys at school looking at me with
obviously carnal thoughts. Even so, I'm what's called a
"full-figured" girl, especially in the hips, bottom and bust,
and
I hoped no one was going to try to suddenly make me a size eight
in a matter of hours.
I needn't have worried. When we got to the exercise room,
instead of the typical gym equipment I was expecting, Pearl led
me to a simple massage table. Pearl told me to lie on the table
on my stomach, and another women came in and gave the most
incredible massage I'd ever had. Actually, it was the first
massage I'd ever had, but it was wonderful. When the masseuse
massaged my buttocks, I got a bit tense, but it passed quickly,
and when she kneaded my breasts and thighs, it seemed so natural
that I didn't think twice about it. By the time she probed my
labia, I was in such a state of tranquility that I eagerly
accepted it as part of the sensuality of the experience.
I was totally at peace with my body. Every muscle was
utterly content. Then Pearl told me to go to level. As calm as
I was, I slipped in easily, my eyes already closed, my mind
already in a state of bliss . I vaguely felt the masseuse
lifting my legs off the table. "Try to keep them raised,"
she
commanded. I held them in the air, then she continued, "Good. Now
spread them apart."
Normally, I'd have been too shy to separate my thighs so
widely, but in my serenity, I was emboldened and I pulled my legs
wide apart. I shivered slightly as I felt the cool air on my
labia. "Very nice," I heard the masseuse say, "you already
shows
signs of receptivity. Now, keep your thighs apart and touch your
heels together." My thighs quivered and my buttocks quivered
against the table as my feet met, making me shiver. I realized
that my vagina was open and moist and I felt a trickle of liquid
sliding down between my buttocks. "Yes," she continued, "you're
quite receptive. You'll have no trouble with Tsu's
preparations."
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"From this point forward," Pearl instructed, "relax
and keep
at level as we prepare you for your meeting with Tsu." My
greatest wish was about to come true and it was hard to remain in
control, but I concentrated on my inner peace. Even so, I'd
falter occasionally and my heart would begin to race.
I was led to another room where I was bathed and dried. My
hair was brushed and simply styled. I felt utterly pampered.
Then I was taken to a small room.
The lighting was dim and diffuse. The only furniture was a
single curved chair without arms, closely facing each other. I
was placed in it and the chair slid backward, so my head was
level with my upturned hips. Then the chair rose until my head
was slightly more than waist-level to Pearl. It was a
surprisingly restful position. I felt as if I was lying in the
palm of a large soft hand with my legs spread and dangling
comfortably in the air. Then Pearl and the other left and I was
alone. I calmed myself and concentrated on my meditative state.
When one is at level, time has no meaning. After I was in
the room alone for minutes or hours or days, I slowly became
aware of another presence. When he began to speak, it was filled
with such peace and love, it was as if we had been talking
intimately for years.
"Are you comfortable, child?"
"Yes, Guru Tsu."
He was standing next to me, his face smiling down at me. He
seemed much younger than I had expected. Instead of the sage
elder I had envisioned, he was trim and muscular. Like every
other male I'd seen at the Common, his long penis stood thick and
rigid. Surprisingly, in retrospect, I didn't find that
threatening in the least.
"Please, child, if you would, call me Tsu. Honorifics
have
no place at the Common. We are all equals in our spirituality.
"I hear and understand, Tsu," I replied, falling
into the
ritual response.
"I have followed your progress with great interest,"
he
said, his hand idly stroking my hair. "Your teachers tell me you
have great wisdom for one so young. This is why you have been
asked to join the Common. They believe you will accept the truth
that is about to be revealed to you.
"But first, I would be honored if you would accept from
me a
gift. A humble adornment, if you will. I should like to call
you Roe, and it would please me if you would take it as your
name." He bowed slightly.
"I am honored to accept," I replied. "To you
and to all, I
am Roe." In the position I was in, I couldn't return the bow,
but I nodded my head.
"Thank you," he said softly, "I am blessed
by your
acceptance." He turned and walked slowly, moving toward my legs.
He said, in a louder voice. "Now, Roe, here is a puzzle. We are
spiritual beings." He paused.
"That always were and always will be, perfect in our
spirituality," I finished.
"Yet," he continued, "we inhabit physical bodies
within a
physical world. Why is that?"
"Our physical bodies, indeed, the physical world is a
manifestation of our spiritual beings," I replied.
"Yes. But if that is so, why is it that our physical
bodies
age and die?"
"Age and deterioration is a reflection of our imperfect
understanding of our spiritual nature." I almost allowed myself
to indulge in a small sense of pride, but instead I maintained
level.
"So we accept that death is evidence of the physical
world's
imperfection. But then we must also accept that birth is also
such evidence."
I thought for a second. "Yes," I decided. "In
the
environment of pure enlightenment there is no death. Therefore
there would be no birth."
"So," he said, "the agents of birth, the ovum
and the sperm,
are the result and exist only because of our blindness to our
true spirituality.
"Yes," I agreed.
He had moved so that he was standing at my feet, facing me.
"And that would also mean that the abstractions of male and
female, active and passive, yin and yang, are also the
consequence of the misunderstanding of our spirituality, is that
right?"
I fell silent as I contemplated. Then I spoke. "No, Tsu,
that is not right. Yin and yang are perfect states, not bound by
the physical. There is an error in reason."
He moved forward. "Your teachers spoke truth. You are
wise
beyond your years." His hand rose to stroke my inner calve.
"The error, Roe, is in the initial fact and the unstated
assumption. The unstated word. 'Merely.' Our physical bodies
are not 'merely' a manifestation of our spiritual beings. They
are essential to our journey, to our enlightenment."
His eyes grew intense as he stared into mine. "In
disengaging the spiritual from the physical and designating our
actions as either only spiritual or physical, we are overwhelmed
with hunger while starving ourselves spiritually.
Our spiritual beings need nourishment. This sustenance
manifests itself as the flow of essence from the center outward.
Conceptually, from the earth to the heavens. This is physically
manifest in the mating of male and female.
"I need not tell you that, we, male and female, have
a
physical need for coitus. This is borne from a spiritual need
for physical union, for the coupling of the male and female, to
allow the flow of spiritual essence from the earth, through the
male, to the heaven, through the female. This need is strong.
You have noticed this, especially here, have you not?"
I nodded. I was beginning to struggle with maintaining
level while his hand was stroking my leg, his fingers moving
slowing upward towards my thigh,, but I was aware enough to
believe I noticed a discrepancy. I waited to mention it.
"This need is the physical manifestation of our need
for
spiritual nourishment. This nourishment is normally consumed via
the physical chakra. In the male this is mundanely known as the
prostate, in the female as the cervix.
Tsu must have noticed that I was having trouble staying at
level. He stopped stroking my leg and continued. "When
confronted with this need to exchange essence yet unable to
connect with the spiritual flow and receive nourishment, chakras,
the male has no choice but to cannibalize his own life essence.
This is manifest as sperm. In the female it is manifest as the
ovum."
I was beginning to understand the implication of his words.
But the discrepancy bothered me. "Tsu," I interrupted, "the
earth is traditionally represented as yin and the heavens as
yang, but you describe the flow reversed. The male, the active,
passes essence to the female, the passive."
Tsu smiled. "This is the manifestation. This is the cause
of our starvation." He paused.
I understood in a surge of enlightenment. I cried, "My
God,
I see! The male is meant to be yin and the female is supposed to
be yang!" The import of the realization was startling.
"Yes, Roe," Tsu said, grinning, "You are, indeed,
most
perceptive. The male is unable to pass the spiritual essence
actively. He is the conduit and the female is the active
recipient. She must draw the essence from him."
I eagerly nodded, excited at the insight. "So that, with
the male as the passive conduit and the female as the active
recipient, the direction of the spiritual flow is from yin to
yang, the degeneration of the couples' beingness is negated, the
cycle of birth and death is broken!." I began to shake. "Tsu,
I
understand! I understand!"
In my excitement, I had completely left my meditative state.
I was beginning to babble something about entropy when Tsu
instantly broke through my agitation by reaching out and placing
his hand upon my pubic mound. The sudden intimate contact made
me gasp.
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